Two Taoist Tales

Two tales of mind-boggling Taoist magic, filled with all sorts of shenanigans including inventive fight sequences (which more often than not substitute the paper-thin plots), fierce and quite frankly bonkers looking enemies (like the ‘banana monster’, which looks more like a watermelon monster…) plus other outlandish characters all trying to outdo each other with their formidable martial arts skills – welcome to the world of TAOISM DRUNKARD and THE YOUNG TAOISM FIGHTER, where elements of surreal fantasy, horror, kung fu and comedy collide. Just don’t attempt to figure out the madcap plots, as you will be wasting your time!

Throughout the 1980s and beyond, Hong Kong’s prolific film industry launched a genre cycle which drew upon Taoist folklore and which proved to be hugely popular. The two aforementioned films are now considered cult classics from the celebrated Yuen Clan. One word of warning though: Be prepared, be very prepared!

TAOISM DRUNKARD (Dir: Yuen Cheung-yan; 1984) features the director in a double-role, namely as permanently drunk kung-fu master ‘Drunken Taoist’ (sporting chipmunk teeth) and as a grandmother! It’s off to a bizarre start when Drunken Taoist quite literally races into action in his little rodent-shaped car (perhaps the car is meant to resemble his rat-like features) and makes his spectacular entrance in the Dragon Tiger Mountain temple, of all places. Due to his intoxicated state, he ends up crashing into the temple and accidentally destroys a sacred statue in the process. Enter his understandably angry older superior (Hsiao Hou-tao) who not only reads Drunken Taoist the riot act but demands atonement. Yes, Drunken Taoist is tasked with finding a young man who still is a virgin, so he can take on the revered position which the older superior currently holds. Cue for some slapstick shenanigans before a suitable boy by the name of Wu Shun-chiu (Yuen Yat-chor) appears on the horizon, chaperoned by his granny (director Cheung-yan). Of course, nothing is straightforward because Shun-chiu has a girlfriend and really, for how long will he remain a virgin? But that’s the least of the obstacles because Shun-chiu enters a chamber of secrets (think Harry Potter) and here, he finds himself confronted with truly weird death traps and an even weirder ‘banana monster’, which is a robot-like, black round ball with sharp, chattering teeth and resembles a black water melon (or a wind-up toy) more than a banana! Adding to the complications, there’s also a dastardly sorcerer called Old Devil (Yuen Shun-yi) and his female accomplice Starry Devil (Liu Hao-li). There’s much comic relief when Drunken Taoist’s efforts to keep Shun-chiu a virgin (at least until his task is completed) are hampered by Shun-chiu girlfriend’s sister (Lo Pei-ying) and another challenge in a rather voluptuously built dame (Tsui Sam-oi) who sports two ‘antennas’ made of hair on her head. There’s also a lot of shape-shifting going on among other things.

On to the even weirder world of THE YOUNG TAOISM FIGHTER (Dir: Chen Chi-hwa; 1986) in which prank-loving Taoist kung fu student Ko Sheng (Yuen Yat Chor) is close to facing expulsion from the Yin Yang Clan school. We also see Ko, together with his rather useless sidekick (Tai Bo) meddling in some magic which results in mini-me clones of the two students, with the intent of avoiding domestic duties. In order to impress his teachers and make them change their minds about him, Ko steals an ancient manual from a secret chamber which is guarded by… talking turtles! It goes without saying that studying the stolen manuscript doesn’t go according to plan, especially the so-called ‘Separate Body’ kung fu. In an initial sub-plot, which later merges with the main plot, female warrior Lee Chien Ngo (Liu Hao-li again), clad like a Japanese Ninja, is on a mission to stop a very nasty sorcerer (Kwan Chung) from carrying out his revolting deeds, in this case draining urine from local children who all pee into the same pipe-like container. The urine is then delivered to Fu Luen (Yen Shi-kwan), the evil leader of the rival Tien Wu Men school, who guzzles back said pee together with something we shall not even mention here in order to become a mighty kung fu fighting machine. Alas, Fu Luen has a major opponent in Ko, who by now is fighting alongside feisty warrior dame Lee. Cue for a truly hair-raising showdown during which Ko’s limbs get separated and take on the fight individually. If you ever wanted to see a duel where separated legs, arms and even a head take on a rival, then look no further. This second offering is even more bonkers than ‘Taoism Drunkard’ and also boasts a little dancing interlude with a riff from one of Roxy Music’s greatest hits.

TWO TAOIST TALES may not be everyone’s cup of green tea and the question is: if all the stops are pulled out right from the outset, where do you go from there? Nonetheless, connoisseurs of the weird and wacky will find much to like here!
The 2-Disc Blu-ray set contains the usual plethora of Bonus Material and the first print-run (2000 copies only) are presented in a Limited Edition O-card slipcase, including a Collector’s booklet.